Monthly Archives: April 2014

It is April

It is April. What significance does it have? Nothing really.

I took my PRAXIS Core exam and I’m impatiently waiting for the results–after all, it’s going to determine whether or not I get into the teaching program at uni.  On that same day, my brother turned 15. So yesterday (when I got a chance) I gave him “the talk.” It was awkward for him, fun for me.

Now I am incredibly behind in all my classes and I have a few days to catch up. I am the biggest procrastinator I know; honestly, I have to get myself back on track and inshaAllah I will do that this summer. Having summer classes when Ramadan comes is gonna really force me to manage my time more efficiently.

ICNA 2014 is around the corner and everyone I know is going. I don’t think I’m gonna be able to go although I like to believe that I’ll find a way. Not being able to drive is really coming to haunt me from every angle at this point.

I really wanna be able to go places. *sigh*

I think I should get back to working on my paper on Arthur Rimbaud. His poetry is intriguing, deep, personal, and hallucinatory. In short, he’s a genius. But, his poetry is also very annoyingly disgusting at times which makes me wanna hate him. So yeah. And I have to write 2800 words about how he’s “significant.”

My sociology professor decided that assigning us more than 8 essays per semester wasn’t enough so she gave us a 20-25 pg. research paper to do. It’s a 300-level class! I don’t know what she thinks we are but…I have 2 days to write that paper and I’m freaking out.

Btw, I’ve been wanting to get Hijama done for the longest time ever, so today I was finally able to get in touch with the Hijama lady and she offered to make me an appointment at the clinic. But obviously, I have to ask my dad first. And it costs $100. Yikes! I was saving my money for ICNA (if that happens). But I guess I shall make the choice.

 

All people really want from relationships is to have someone love them and care for them; that’s it. And they want to hear it. It’s really simple but people still don’t understand. 

But no matter how much pain you have hidden inside, don’t let it stop you from being the better person. My parents rarely ever expressed their love to me (because of rigid cultural family traditions) and I think I have sort of an underlying problem because of that, but I’ve been trying to change.

Today in my Seerah class, Sh. Abdulbary Yahya said (on a tangent) that sometimes just get like a candy or a little something for your siblings and when they ask why, just say: “Because I love you.”

Now this is gonna sound kinda ridiculous to y’all but that’s something very hard for me to do. I’ve never heard “I love you” so it’s hard for me to say it. If there’s one thing that I really, really wish my siblings don’t inherit from our parents and me, it’s the inability to express our (positive) emotions.

So now I’ve a new goal: I’m gonna buy something for all 5 of my siblings inshaAllah and when they ask me why, I’m gonna say: “Because I love you.”

Good night 🙂