Oppression in the Home

Sometimes cultural parents are just preparing their daughters for submission to a man.

Islam requires both men and women to submit to Allah Alone.

There is a place of respect that husbands have in Islam and it is their God-given right, and women need to embody that type of attitude and behavior into their life while expecting reward from Allah. However, this does not mean that women cannot have their own free will and do as they please as long as they are within the limits of the Shari’ah.

Those who seek to control women are sometimes outright insecure and carry misogynist thoughts, but some are actually ‘scared’ that their daughters/wives/sisters will go astray.

Islam has placed a responsibility upon men to take care of the women in their households and yes, along with financial care, that includes their religious and spiritual well-being, and it is possible that when ‘religious’ men fall into the trap of using any kind of restraining rules or abuse, they are doing so because of this mountain on their back called “responsibility.”

They are simply ignorant. And that ignorance drives them to do things against women that are unimaginable.

What men (and this includes both parents as well) need to understand is that Islam does not allow you to oppress people.

Islam does not allow you to ‘cage’ people in your ignorant mindset and consequential “list of prohibitions.”

“A parent has sinned if they have used inappropriate, harsh, or curse words while disciplining the child.” (Prohibitions of the Tongue)

Firstly, educate yourself about the proper Islamically-acceptable ways to ‘discipline’ the people in your home.

Secondly, educate young women about their rights and responsibilities as daughters, as wives, as mothers, and as the contributing members of society.

When you teach your daughters true Islam, trust them that if they won’t disobey Allah, they won’t disobey you. They won’t break your trust.

Have some trust in the women in your homes; in your daughters, in your sisters, in your wives.

Have some trust in Allah.

If you have taught the people under your care about Allah and His religion and they are still going astray, that does not justify your oppression upon them. How can you claim to “bring people back to the truth” by committing the very sin that Allah has made haram upon Himself, ‘azza wa jal??

Abu Dharr (RAA) quoted the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) Saying among what he narrated from Allah, the Most High that He has said, “O MY slaves, I have made oppression unlawful for myself and I have made it unlawful among you, so do not oppress one another.” (Related by Muslim).

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